Newbie - first post and ?s

[mishka422]

"Gee, husband, I'm sorry that my response to your adultery is so unsettling to you. Sleep well; I'll be here, in the kitchen, next to the knives if you need me."

PRICELESS Puppy!

Ash...I'm going to hope you got some sleep last night despite H's insensitive A$$hole-ism. He is not worth destroying your health and mind for....trust me. He can only have as much power over your emotions as you give him, so decide not to give him any.

You grieve however you feel you need to. Your H doesn't have a feeling bone left in his body where you are concerned. He is only thinking of himself and OW. It's hard to hear, I know, even harder to accept. Honestly, the best thing you can do for yourself and your son right now is to completely detach from your H. Let him spin wildly out of control all on his own. He will you know. As soon as the fantasy he has been living in for so long comes crashing down around him and becomes the ugly reality of everyday living, he'll realize what he's done. Mine did.....far too late. The detachment will keep you and your son from being pulled down with him.

So, looking at the realities of what you are facing:

1)BIL's passing is unconditionally the first priority right now. Emotionally, you need to grieve, but try to compartmentalize the grief so it doesn't become intertwined with the pain from your M.

2)Living arrangements - unfortunately it's sounding more and more like he is going to force something here. I can't imagine that any man would kick his W and child to the curb, but he's going to make life miserable for you if you stay in the same house much longer. Do you have any options? Can you kick him out?

3)I'm not sure if I have read it here or not, do you work?