SP, I would suggest you put the note back on the desk, or just leave it in a drawer...or wherever it sits now...
Some of the best advice I ever received from my T regarding any notes/email/written communications from my STBX was couched in a simple test: Is she asking you any questions? If she's not then there's no need to respond.
Of course, there are times when even a note without questions merits a response - as in matters concerning the children - but this note, her words, were not for you to puzzle and solve...they were for her to put to word something that troubled her....and let it stop there.
Mind reading seldom works, and note reading hardly seems to offer more promise of understanding.
If Retrouvaille is a possibility...I think it would be best to leave that up to her...and to continue doing what you have to do for you and your kids. Keep the focus on you - doing so reduces the number of variables you have to contend with every day - and also lessens the impact of dealing with someone that is in a state of constant flux - and inevitable inconsistency.
While you may have to live with the contradictions and inconsistencies that have been forced upon you by your sitch...she has to make her own decisions about what comes next...That said, one thing that does come through the note is that she's not happy...and feels unsettled in herself...perhaps the trick then, is to love someone enough to give them the space to feel safe in that state of being unsettled - safe enough for them to make a journey of it - toward some kind of resolve (regardless of the outcome) - rather than have it become a permanent place of conflict (which is where my STBX seems to reside).
