You spend too much time worrying about other stuff... take some time and get to know your wife again...
You never know, Doc. God knocks on our door frequently, all the time in fact -- we just fail to hear Him sometimes, until, that is, we encounter these crossroads in our lives.
In any event, you are certainly to be admired for making the most of the employment situation, to see this hiatus as the opportunity it represents. You also seem to have incredible patience, and it serves you very well.
Hey Everyone... I am still alive. A little scared though with Michael Jackson (50) and Billy Maze..(50) Passing on..(Me 51).. I'm Sorry for going dark. I have some reasons that I don't want to say too much here but I was getting carried away with some things to escape reality. Don't worry I have them under control now though. Well today is the first day of my "Sabbatical" strange but since I have been off I have been up everyday at 5:00 am and then I am off to work on my woodpile by 7:00 am and am there until about 10:00 or 11:00 then come home (IT GETS HOT OUT THERE) then after dinner I usually will go out again until dark. Have been cleaning out allot of stuff around the house. So I have been busy. Don't know if any of you have seen the movie "ground hog day" Where Bill Murphy plays this guy that every morning he wakes up and relives the past day over again. EVERY DAY FEELS LIKE SUNDAY to me. I am still stuck in that frame of mind about think I need to take care of at work "tomorrow" and then realize there are no more tomorrows..(At work). Not too much has changed in my "marriage" but some strange stuff has happened. The other night our outside cat got into a fight with a baby raccoon. Wife was upset and I had to go out and rescue the cat. It was a baby raccoon and I think the cat was coming out ahead but she was worried so I said put the cat in the garage for the night. Well I cam in a little later and the &%^$% cat was in MY bed. SO I told wife it could sleep there tonight. Well with all of the excitement we were up late. I still got up in the morning and went do work on my wood business. When I got home wife was awake but she fell asleep shortly after on the couch. I told son who was playing video games that mom was asleep and I was going over MIL house so if Mom wakes up let her know. Well I was there for a little while and the phone rings. I JOKENLY told MIL that that's wife checking up on me. Well guess what. IT WAS HER. She just asked MIL if I was there and really did not need to talk to me... WHAT? She wanted to see if I was really there? Anyway I got my Money from the company.(TAXED 40%) And the temp around here has been in the 100s so they were having a sale on above ground pools so I bought one. Wife informed me that it was nice but she probably would not be going swimming. I asked her why not? She said "because I am FAT. I don't like my body and its hard for me to get up that latter." Ok back tracing a little when I told my "counselor" last year that My wife would not go swimming with our son and I always had to stop what I was doing so he could go swimming.( We don't let him go by himself) because she would say she was "too fat" he told me to tell her that "this is her son too and she needs to get over it. She was NOT to fat to have some guy take naked pictures of her" Well the weather changed shortly after so I never got the chance So fast forward to today.. When she said that I told her that the ladder was the ONLY legitimate excuse. She said they are all legitimate to me" I really did not want to get into it at that moment.(son was in listening distance) So I told her I don't want to discuss it right now and left to go set up the pool. A short time later she came outside and said she was going to the store. I asked her what she was going to buy. She said she was going to try to find a "Fat woman" bathing suit. I told her that offends me I would prefer she say "healthy womans suit. She told me they call them "Plus size" I told her plus is OK. Plus is good. Its way better that a negative. So anyway am I getting through to her? I don't know. What I do know is that she has made no attempt to return to our room. She is helping me out allot with the paper work from being "laid off". She knows what to do since she was laid off three years ago. Well Independence Day is this Saturday. Our anniversary is the 14th. I think I may push for some conversation on the 4th. Getting back to me.. I have had the P.D contact me wanting me to go back to dispatching but I don't want to do that. The pay is good better that what I was making but the pressure is just too much. I have an appointment with the admissions at Empire Collage on the 10th to talk about going back to school. Well I got to go it is getting late. Will update more soon. Bye Doc
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
You sound good, Doc. Good idea with the pool. One thing I learned with a backyard pool, nobody cares what you look like. It's a private pool. Good that you have the firewood business. Of course, the market must be slow in 100 degree weather, but winter will come again. It is my responsibility, in the job I no longer have, to remind you to be sure to store the wood far from your house. But I have a friend who may be able to hire me soon. Good things will come your way. Just give them a little time.
Ya know Doc, Ya have to think in terms of your own health and how you feel. H used to do and to some point still does think"oh my god im'e that age" but, look at their health issues Jackson had a huge drug problem and im'e sure it will come back as COD and Billy Mays had a plethera of health issues heart disease ect... Then ther is Ed McMahon and most recent Carl Malden Who lived very long healthy lives. I guess im'e saying YA never know so live each day like it's your last and make YOURSELF as happy as possible.
I understand what your saying about W but, I do feel for her as I have battled my weight for years since the birth of my children and still am. It eats at you. I still have issues with it and I am a pretty confident person I feel. It's not that she doesn't want to go in the pool with son. She probably is in tears thinking she wants to but doesn't want anyone to see how she's herself.
Quote:
[/quote] She was NOT to fat to have some guy take naked pictures of her"[quote]
You have to leave this one and OM in the past. It's because it was part of the fantasy that they made her feel differant and now there is the reality.
Hope you understand what Im'e trying to say here. Give her time she'll come around.
Pretty cool for the backyard pool.
JAK
You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when, you can only decide how you're going to live now. ~Joan Baez
I'm going to ask you to have some compassion for your W around the weight issue. If you are a woman in America, you have battled the issue of how you look. We are bombarded by images in the media of skinny, "perfect" women, and we don't measure up (in our own minds). I can sit here as an intelligent woman who knows that's all cr@p, and yet, I still HATE to put on a bathing suit.
My H doesn't really understand either...he tells me men don't like those skinny sticks, that they like curves, etc., but those images have been blasted at me since I was small. I have an easier time with someone pointing out a character flaw then in going out in something I think makes me look "fat"...and I'm really not fat.
Men have more freedom there...it's okay for y'all to walk around with chubby bellies. The closest thing I think men have is the loss of their hair, but even that doesn't really happen until later in life most of the time.
She's not just being difficult; your W hates herself and hates her body, and to parade that around is just horrifying. The OM somehow made her feel attractive and sexy--probably what was pulling her toward him, like a drug because she could pretend for a little while that she WAS the hot model.
Women live with lots of "shoulds" about how they should act and be. Not that men don't, but ours are different from yours.
I live 10-miles from the beach, have lived here for 5-years, and I haven't been swimming in the ocean in all that time...something I LOVE to do...because I don't want to expose myself in my bathing suit. I know it's crazy...and I'm working on it.
Just perspective.
All in all, you sound pretty good.
SD
Me: 40 H: 43 H had EA from 2/06-9/06 Bomb 5/06 Piecing since 9/2006 3/2008: Boundary setting 7/2009: Boundary crossing~dropped my own bomb. 8/2010: Marriage finally on track!
