If you trust the process of MLC and that infidelity does not yield secure relationships, you will not be fooled, but many are easily fooled. Have faith in the process.

He is enjoying his freedom and all that comes with it. Why would he ever want to give that up?Because freedom isn’t free. Though he is free to be with her, there is rarely freedom in an OW relationship. It comes with guilt, losing everything one holds dear and an OW holding a leash—since she needs to monitor and control her married man. She wants and needs to be rescued—desperately. Desperation yields fear, controlling and clinging. If you were dating a married man, would you trust him? Maybe you would be stupid enough to trust in the beginning, but not for long. What freedom? OW’s are distrusting by nature, which makes them controlling and possessive. The more freedom he has to be with the OW, the closer the relationship gets to the end.

How can I compete with the fantasy of her undying love and attention, not to mention the easier life!You can’t. It’s a fantasy; you do not need to compete. In the end, reality is better. The end is just a long ways away. Let her compete by trying to maintain the fantasy amidst the realization of living together—bills, messy houses, bowel movements and sickness are absent in fantasies.

He seems content to stay with her. It really feels like the end, especially since he has an OW.This is normal, but also understand that things are not always as they seem. If the affair is new or only recently public, according to the MLC process, he should be content to be with her. He's getting what he thinks he wants. MLCers have OWs; an affair is part of the MLC process. Consider that the presence of an OW helps your chances rather than hinders them. The more in-love he thinks he is—actually in-fatuation—the less real it is. Are you insulted that he is getting serious so quickly? Fools rush in, so let them. The process of destruction starts now but is not immediate—and you are not the destroyer. Infidelity destroys itself.
Thanks Sodderly.Let me know what you think...sounds like she knows something about this MLC