Why not?

[AlexEN]

Okay, now we know SP has a pointy-head, too...

What she's found most important -- most essential -- is rediscovering her sense of Self. We've been talking lately about the familiar "words and actions" dichotomy -- she'd said she was waiting "action" from her Wayward and would no longer pay attention to the words. It's like in Schnarch's Passionate Marriage where he says you don't have to believe something until you experience it.

I replied to her that "action" seemed too impersonal to me, because "action" often happens without thought. For me what has become important is "deeds" -- a "deed" requires what pointy-heads like Smiley's Person call 'agency,' IOW active human intervention, thought, decision, purpose.

So we've been chewing this over lately -- what should one count as a "deed," and -- more importantly for both her and for me -- what does one do, as the Left-Behind, when one sees a deed?

But, SP, tell me, doesn't one have to also have to be able to distinguish if the deed is a True Deed or a False Deed? An example of the latter being, for example, the WAS who agrees to go to MC just so he/she can say: "I tried."

And, in analyzing the type of Deed, aren't we risking doing what we're counseled not to do... that is, spend too much time thinking about what the WAS action or inaction means... when the focus should be on US and our actions/deeds and what we CAN control?

I guess it seems to me that Deeds can be just as complicated to interpret, if not more so, than Actions. And if an action can happen without thought isn't it likely to be more representative of the other person's "true" mindset (assuming it could even be properly interpreted)?

But having said that, assuming one believes the thoughts, decisions, and purposes behind a Good Deed are Pure, it would be much meaningful than an Action. And, speaking of Mobius Strips, a False Deed is probably on par with Words in terms of its Value... which brings it full circle back to where it started.

As one who just received a note from W (an Action in which she expressed Words she has not before) that I am trying not to over-analyze -- but, it also seems to be a Deed -- yours is a very timely post. Is it a trap for me if I were to try to determine what kind of Deed it represents?

And, all these esoterics aside, I would welcome the thoughts of any of the wonderful posters on this thread about those words, that action or that deed, because try as I might to fully-detach, her note has made my brain into soup today...

-AlexEN