Why cant men and women just be "unhappy" in their marriage. Why does it always have to be MLC.
Are you implying that you would rather be M to him and be unhappy in that MR than be D?
I do not believe it always has to be a MLC! Not sure where you came up with the idea that every time a couple S or D that there is a MLC involved.
Renee, I believe you spend way too much energy thinking about this type of issues........like the question you asked. What good does it do you? It will not change your stitch. It will not change the reality of your life as a D woman. I feel that you are still draging up things in the past too much for your mental welfare. For example, the way your XH disciplined your son. I agree with you that he did not do it correctly,but it is done and it can't be undone. So, why go through this over and over again? I'm talking about for "your" sake....not ours.
I don't blame you for feeling upset toward your son. He showed how unreliable he is and how childish he is when it comes to his dad. I can understand that R, also. But, there is no excuse for him treating you the way he did about the car. He does need to suffer the consequenses of not being allowed to use it again until he proves he can be trusted. I may differ from some others about this, but I don't know that I would sit there and listen to his story about your XH and GF. That is showing a lot of disrespect for your feelings. Anybody that was his age should know you are extremely hurt over what his dad did and to talk to "you" about his dad's fishing with GF is so uncalled for. I think the next time, I would hold up my hand and stop him and tell him that you do not care to hear about what your XH and live-in GF does. And tell him that it is disrespectful to his mother. Apparently, he needs to have this pointed out to him. Why should you have to endure hearing about your XH & GF? Some day when you are detached and at the place it does not bother you.....it may not matter, but I still think it is disrespectful for your son to talk to you about it.
You will have a spiritual battle to deal with since you are involved in Church and have been blessed recently. The "enemy" will try to discourage you and stop you from growing. "Discouragement" is the number one tool used to stop Christians from growing. Be on guard and realize when issues at work (like what happened) will happen and you need to handle it as one who has victory and not one who is defeated. You can handle your personal life the same way. The "One" who is in you is greater than he that is in the world!
Take care, Sandi
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
