I imagine that she will stay involved with them if that is her way of being. Depending on the kids, once they hit 18-20 they go off to college and want a lot less contact with the parents anyway. My D24 only calls when she needs money, and that's not too frequently. The kids put up a wall of their own. It might take them years to notice if she puts one up. But either way, that isn't your problem. Her relationship with her children is hers. She needs to own it.
