What's it really all about?

[Sara]

Yes, SF. I did. I turned 56 two days ago. I noticed this 10 years ago when a friend, good looking woman, told me it was her 50th birthday. And I looked at her at thought, "Yup, you can tell a woman who turns 50." And it is true. I look at myself in pictures. And I see it too.

[Puppy Dog Tails]

I disagree. I think there are some STUNNING 50 year old women.

[Silver Fox]

And that's your attitude? You believe you're "DONE"?

Well, someone better tell Madonna.

[Sara]

I live in real life. I suppose if I had a posse of physical trainers, make-up artists and plastic surgeons to keep me looking good, and that was the entire focus of my days, yeah, I could look younger than I do. But in the end, who are you fooling?

[steady]

...I think things, as many posters have written about in recent days, will get particularly nasty, when she learns the same things I have heard.

When I was first told it gets nasty I thought to myself, nah, not between her and I. Boy was I wrong. Beware a cornered animal.

But, Sara, she doesn't seem to be asking herself these questions; it seems that she just believes it will all work itself out and that I (and our marriage) were really the cause of all of her unhappiness. With those in the rearview mirror, now that she has found herself, all will be right with the universe and the kids will be happy because she will be happy...

You just quoted word for word the attitude my W has adopted also. Wait till she figures out her 'fantasy' future isn't gonna go anywhere near what she is thinking. I thought about that today - nothing of what my W thought was going to take place actually did since she dropped the D bomb. Not one thing...lol. I'll wager high that as the future unfolds the picture won't look like anything she is imagining.

[steady]

Some people are done after any age, some ain't. I've known people who were 'done' after 30... Really nothing worth debating about - except for a clash of egos.

The actual point on this thread isn't what is/isn't going to happen to AlexEn's W in some imagined future, but rather what AlexEN needs to do NOW to protect himself and the kids.

[Silver Fox]

Right. And Alex said this:

Sara, she is gorgeous. Looks better now than she did in her 20s. She has more than 5 years left!

[Sara]

Good luck to her. I think Steady is correct. But time will tell. I still think Alex, that you should stop standing in her way. As long as she thinks you are trying to bar the door, she will be scrambling for the exit.

[AlexEN]

SF,

I said that in response to Sara because I don't believe it's over at 50! But, I didn't bring that topic into this thread!

-A

[AlexEN]

Good luck to her. I think Steady is correct. But time will tell. I still think Alex, that you should stop standing in her way. As long as she thinks you are trying to bar the door, she will be scrambling for the exit.

Sara,

I agree with you... I am not blocking the door... I accept her decision, even though I disagree with it. If you read back a few pages, my Target is, as @Steady said, the kids... I worry that history will repeat itself with her children, as she walked away from her mother, now me... Next? And, if it's the children, that will be the biggest tragedy of all in this sad story...

-AlexEN