We know that it's not you and it's him because remember??? he's the one that said your son didn't look like he had strep and so therefore didn't want to meet you to give him medicine. Does that sound like a reasonable, rational, responsible, sane person?
A good person, a sane person, would have worked on the marriage. And if he was truly miserable and all your fault and he is so upstanding then he would have divorced you before cheating on you. No, he's a s**t. He wants you to take all the blame and hate yourself. He lies and lies and lies some more.
He won't get a life insurance policy? Remember even the divorce lawyers don't like him. It's not you it's him. But he is soo bad that he wants you to think it's you.
