Can it get any worse?

[Dawn of Hope]

Glam,
I am so sorry to hear what you are going through. I feel so bad for you. Please look after yourself and remember we are all here for you. Everyone has offered exellent advice; please take it.

You have tried so hard for so long, and now this. Give yourself some space to get past the shock before you do something irreversible. See your C, see a L, see your minister, see your doctor. Do what must be done to protect yourself and your children. If you need to ask him politely to leave you alone for awhile, there is nothing wrong with that. You know not to tell all and sundry about what he has done...the truth will come out sooner or later--it always does, you know that--and it is best if it doesn't come from you broadcasting it from your pain.

These WAS's (of whatever stripe, MLC or not) are living in this fantasy world, believing the rules are different for them, and whatever they are doing isn't so bad, the "usual" standards don't apply to them, and they can get away with anything and won't be found out...ALL WRONG! The piper never works for free, and will present his bill sooner or later...and he has spine-crackers to back him up on collecting it. It sounds to me like your H is nowhere near understanding this yet.

Breathe. Cry as needed. Breathe. Remember all that you have survived so far; I know it doesn't feel like it right now, but you have developed the resilience to survive this too.

It is not your fault, and you have nothing to be ashamed of. The shame is his, and he will realize it eventually. Do not take on burdens that are not yours to carry. This is his, not yours. I remember, in one of my DB coach sessions, telling her how much I feared H telling me that OW was pregnant, and asking her what I should say if that happened. She told me to just say, as calmly as possible, "What do you plan to do about that?" Remember, this is NOT YOUR FAULT. Do not take his monkey and put it on your back. Just get into a place where you can decide what you need to do to protect yourself and your children from the fallout.

We know how horrible this is for you. Some here have been through the same thing and know it in excruciating detail. Look after yourself. Lick your wounds and do what you need to do to heal. We care about you and want only the best for you.

Remember that you are loved, regardless of what he does. You are loved.

Peace and blessings,
Dawn