You didn't just have a setback today. Your whole situation is one setback after another. I am not a mean person at all. In fact, I am an extremely tolerant and caring person, but there comes a time when I feel pushed to my limits and I will confront someone. I have read and read your situation for months. I've been here since April and your responses and who you are haven't changed. It's maddening and it makes people who give you sound advice feel taken advantage of. *cue you typing back, I'm trying, blah blah blah* I think you upset me so much because you resemble my STBXH. You are codependent because you have no life of our own. You are existing. When you have your children you plan these fun things to do, but all during these fun things you are focused on it showing your STBXW what a great father you are in hopes that it will open her eyes and make her take you back. You are not doing these things with your children to further your relationship with them and to help yourself. Everything you do is in the hopes that it will change your STBXW's mind. Nothing is for Kevin and it certainly isn't for your children. Get a life! Do things simply because you enjoy them. Do things because they are fun and you are building relationships with your daughters. Do not do things to further your agenda to get back together with your STBXW. LET HER GO! SHE IS GONE! If I were her, I would stay gone as well. You are the actual ball and chain that is referenced when getting married. You are the drowning man who someone tries to save and he pulls you under trying to claw his way for air. You have got to change. There is no other plan. No other option. Remaining who you are is only going to get you what you have always got.
"It is excruciating pain. It is the pain of separation, the pain of loss, the pain of dreams and expectations unrealized. It is the loss and death of a mirage."
