You will see how easy your emotions will swing every direction if you don't keep a tight reign on them. When your feelings are reacting to your wife's behavior, then your self-confidence goes out the door. When that happens, you aren't "Mr. Fun" any longer and you appear to be pouting and having a pity party. I'm so glad that you went on to the swiming pool. Next time don't say anything about you not being invited b/c it draws attention to being "weak" or sounding "needy". I know you didn't intend for it to sound that way, but it is how I preceived it and I bet your W did too, if she heard you.
Do you see how you can control your actions and the results change your emotions. When you went on to the pool and was acting like "Mr. Personality" out there.....that was so much better than sitting alone feeling angry or pity. It boosted you self-esteem and that is what women are attracted to. A man can show self-confidence without acting like a jack-a$$. It is when he's being a jerk that it turns women off. True self confidence in a man is a huge turn-on! And....even when it is not a sexual turn-on for a woman....she admires any man who is self-confident. Another plus with the self-confidence is that a man is able to be detached and drop the rope where his emotions with his W is concerned. He stops appearing "needy" and it certainly gets her attention. He is attractive and she is drawn to him.
I hope you can keep this in mind when you have those days you feel down and discouraged, okay? I really believe you can accomplish the work you need to do. You ARE doing it!
Take care, Sandi
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
