I think that the best you can do is try to think of this as a child from a previous R. I know that its not, and I cant even imagine how hard this must be for you, but I think that you will have to be careful to not punish this little girl for the terrible things that her parents have done.

I think that you are totally right about him needing to fund custody hearings on his own, but part of me keeps thinking that you are a married couple... shouldnt you be going after this together? Im just not positive either way I guess. I will acknowledge that this is an incredibly hard situation, and I just think that this could be part of your challenge as a couple, maybe it could benefit you to fight for this together, after all, this little baby is part of your husband.

Would it be unnacceptable for her to bring the baby to your house so H could have visitation in the home? I mean she drops the baby off and doesnt stay.

I guess I gave the wrong finger to the wrong man...