I can predict what will happen when you give him the cold shoulder and appear to move on with your life - he will want what he cant have. Been there done that. My W asked for a another chance right before our D was final. I knew in my heart that she did not have it in her to ever work hard to regain my trust and I told her no.
You have been at this turmoil a lot longer than I had. I respect your resolve, but I also question where your future is heading. There exists a real possibility that he may always be in and out of your life. Do you deserve a relationship like that? You are still young and in the prime of your life as a woman. I see you have one son. Do you want anymore children? I assume you have dreams of a beautiful married life with a good man that will do all he can to keep his wife happy. Do you realistically believe your H can ever get to the point where he will work his butt off reading books or seeking out the advice of other good men on how to be the best husband for his wife?
I probably should not even post to you as I have a fairly pessemistic attitude now about cheaters. I know of only one person here (gForce) that I followed who had his marriage reconciled happily. It's just that I get this feeling that you are letting every thing your H or his mistress does control your life.
