Thank you, by the way, for laying it out for me. I am always very appreciative of the people on this board.
Me-40 W-41 Together-10 M-8 S-6 S-4 Bomb 5/08 Bomb 10/08 Thought things were better, was wrong. Still living together Wife doesn't think she will ever love me again.
What are we going to do this weekend? After the text talk (if you have not done so already) I would get a plan that does not envolve the children. Go out get a new shirt, some new cologne, and tell her you have to go meet someone out for dinner or drinks or whatever. Even if you do not have anyone to do this with, go do it yourself, but do not tell her you are alone! She has Gal'd her ass off, while you sit at home trying to deceifer ever syllable from her. Let's go.
Ok I had the talk with her. She denies affair, but says she is done. She has zero interest in saving the marriage and wants to end it. We have no money, so she doesn't know how we are going to separate. She says she can go along like we have like nothing is wrong, but figures I wouldn't be comfortable with that. She says she doesn't want to make me sad, but that's it. The therapist told her she already has her mind made up so why bother trying.
Me-40 W-41 Together-10 M-8 S-6 S-4 Bomb 5/08 Bomb 10/08 Thought things were better, was wrong. Still living together Wife doesn't think she will ever love me again.
I'm sorry, Orich. She's lying that it's over, and it's precisely her attraction to him that makes her so unwilling to even TRY to work at your marriage.
Whatever you do, DON'T move out, and DON'T relax your boundaries. In fact, they're about to be more important than ever. If she doesn't like them, why then SHE can leave.
God, I detest affairs. I really, REALLY detest affairs!!!
Ok, I guess this is it now, the part that I have been dreading. She has gone cold now. She only talks to me in short sentances with no emotion. She slept on the couch for the first time. I had to go to the hospital last night because my grandmother had a heart-attack. (she is fine). When I got back late last night she was on the couch with blanket and pillow. I asked if she was staying there, and she said yes. I shrugged and went to bed and proceeded to have the worst night's sleep on record. We had talked about what to do earlier, but we don't have money for an apartment for one of us, but I don't want to live together with seperate lives, so I don't know what to do next. Thanks for reading.
Me-40 W-41 Together-10 M-8 S-6 S-4 Bomb 5/08 Bomb 10/08 Thought things were better, was wrong. Still living together Wife doesn't think she will ever love me again.
Thanks, pdt. After talking to my Dad, I came to the same conclusion. It will be hard, but I am just going to go on as normal as possible living here and spending as much time as possible with my kids.
Me-40 W-41 Together-10 M-8 S-6 S-4 Bomb 5/08 Bomb 10/08 Thought things were better, was wrong. Still living together Wife doesn't think she will ever love me again.
Just caught up and now my day is ruined. I'm heartbroken for you.
Keep going to the gym and try to start detaching emotionally. If she feels that she's losing you (by you starting to live for yourself,) she might take notice and think a bit. She can't be warm toward you or sleep with you because she will feel like she's cheating on the OM. I know, it's just horrible.
No more enabling her running around. Time to say NO, you're not going to be stuck alone with the kids on so many nights.
