confused.....want to do something.....

[traveldane]

Orchid,

Wow, it sounds like such a confusing, emotionally charged visit.

I can relate to you on som ethings and sympathize with how confusing this all is.

I like Stuck's advice to you above. I think that its very encouraging that your H. had such a good time with you..he will have those positive memories to reference when "sorting out" what he wants. I can relate to hearing references to MLC/identity crisis from H., and think that you should "drop the rope" as they say and keep with your new job, your GALing, and put him aside until he can be more clear about what he wants.

Avoiding the D is a condundrum because while you should not be manipulated into doing something you don't want (they want the D, they should have to facilitate it) if you resist it or refuse to sign, H. will only focus on you not respecting/honoring what he wants right now. I'd say discuss it with him as little as possible. If he contacts you to ask about the status, say "I'd rather let the lawyers handle this, mine will contact yours about the paperwork. I understand how you feel about it so there is no need for us to discuss if further. It's all in process".

Wondering how you are feeling now that he is gone. Take some time to decompress, then sort through your feelings and priorities. You are managing this so well.

Take care-