Welcome Lamby...yes please do create a post down in the SSM section - You will get more specified advice. But keep this post going as well, because this section gets a lot of traffic and so many knowlegeable people come through here.
From your first post: "I know myself and I find that I daydream about leaving and running away with basically any man / woman / human who will be willing to acknowledge my sexuality. It has gotten to the point that even when we do ML, I'm not that interested. I'm almost ... I can't believe I'm going to say this ... grossed out. So there's my problem."
YIKES! Thank god you are here! You were literally on the brink of an affair, the only missing ingredient was a predator who realized how vulnerable you are to pay too much attention to you!
But from everything else I've read in your sitch on this post, yours is a fixable situation (as long as you can get your H on board, and so far it sounds likely).
One thing to keep in mind, and I can't remember if anyone has already said this to you or not, but this will TAKE A LOT OF TIME to repair, possibly a year or two...but it will be worth it. If you had not found us now, you would have eventually ended up divorced in all likelihood, so you can see how putting the time in to fix this will be SO WORTH IT. But we just have to tell you about the time it will take, because most people who come seeking advice want just "an answer" that universally works and works over night. Such a thing does not exist, so you gotta get real with yourself - this will take time and work.
Hopefully, the work in your case will produce a great sex life, so hurrah!
Welcome, and please do copy your post down to SSM and we'll chat more...
