Hi I reflected on this after reading another persons thread And In Yoga I wondered? Should the OP Know the path we have walked for the past few years?
I wondered why should the OP Have the LUXERY of walking away with our spouses, sometimes creating real relationships or M with them and never knowing the real truth??
The destruction they were part of
the pains we have endured the lies we were told the nights we spent waiting up till 5 am for WAS to get home( from OW) the sleepless night the weight loss the childrens tears our tears our familes burdens the financial ruin years of therapy, reflection on our M, amends to our spouses everything we went thru ( in short)
Not to place Guilt-- BUT I believe to shed truth and light-- they can walk away with our H, but let them walk with the full truth of the A and what it created for everyone...not into la la land like it was just all OK and everyone was fine!
I have to give this more thought I know DB would say do Not send letter But, I would like your individual OPINIONS on this this is not to get H back or hurt them or break them up this is for closure I would hate to end this with everyone still believing it was all ok
any thoughts appreciated.. peace
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
Well, I can speak on this. Since my stbx has been basically living a double life. Telling me one thing, begging to come back, blahblah, and telling the little girl the total oposite thing. That I'm the one bugging him...
I have thought many times, that she should know what a psycho she is dealing with. She is obviously too young and easily manipulated to see through the bs.
BUT...
On the other hand, I don't really think the op cares!! They know that the person is married, has kids, all that jazz, and they obviously don't care. Not the shining examples of morality, these people. i mean really, think about it. If they cared what the kids, or anyone else went through, they would not participate in this relationship.
Someone a long time ago, sorry can't remember who, told me that the OP is always "broken" in some way too. And it is true. So, trying to put reason in front of two broken people, or make them see what they have done, is fruitless...
Just my opinion, and I do understand exactly where you are coming from. You don't know how many times I have wanted to forward j's text messages to the little girl. Not because I want him back, just because I want her to know he is a liar. But, i haven't, and I won't.
"Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out." Robert Collier
"One's best success often comes after their greatest disappointments." Henry Ward Beecher
These people know they are doing the wrong thing and they dont care.
They wont be hearing you because they dont want to hear you. They want to continue to live in their little fantasy world. You would just be spinning your wheels.
I would not give them the satisfaction of knowing how much damage they did because I think they get off on it.
Peace, you are so special and have come so far, dont give them any of your headspace, really. To hell with them.
They will have to live with what they have done and they will have have to face God one day.
Let them blow in the wind.
You hold your head up and know that you acted with dignity and honor, my friend.
I pretty much agree with these two fine upstanding young ladies.
Our ex's or stbx's or mlc'ers or abcde'ers.
Do not want to hear they have problems from anyone. Deep down I think they have a clue that they are not right, but many things stand in the way for them to come to that realization. Denial, fear, pride whatever it may be.
It will fall on deaf ears and actually most likely be projected back at you in one way, shape, or form.
OP's are all jacked up too, yes they are just as broke.
I would say in time the OP would find out about all the lies on their own and maybe one day will probably have to experience the same pain that we have.
Kissak
"What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." Psalms 56:3 M-37 H-37 S-10, D-15 M- 1993 First bomb- 12/23/06 Came and went too MANY times! Gone again 10-25-10
My lawyer told me about a client that was moaning about his wife having an affair. It turns out that the client was the OM that lead to his wife leaving her prior marriage to be with him. My lawyer just pointed out to him the hypocrisy and the fact that if his wife cheated to be with him there was nothing stopping her from cheating again.
