We just talked about how we came to the point of separating. H actually talked most of the time - basically about how drained he was from his schedule + the army + having to work out almost every night... How every day it would be the same argument from me about needing to make more time for family & the marriage, but he didn't have anywhere to take the time from, and eventually he didn't even want to come home at the end of the day to deal with me...
He did say that he a) wouldn't be participating in MC if he didn't want to try to work things out and b) he would not be choosing to not reenlist in the Guard because by the time he got home from a yearlong deployment there would be nothing left of the marriage. And he mostly had good things to say about the marriage - that, yes, it did seem like everything was "next step" - getting married, having kids, buying a house - not that those were things that he didn't want to do or that he regretted - it just seems like we've been running on autopilot and that things have felt "all business" for a while.
Which is true, we haven't had a real vacation in years, and we've only had a handful of date nights since our daughter was born.
I guess a good first session...?
We touched on the no physical affection thing - it's just something H hasn't even thought of. Even as far as not even putting his arm around me when we're sitting on the couch. He's just drained.
MC did say we need to find more time to spend as a couple in order to get the physical affection/attraction part going again. H doesn't know where he'll be able to find that time, since he sees DD so little right now it's important for him to have the face time with her.
