Mojo. The life force. The essence.

[Thinker]

So why doesn't WAS see that, s/he says in anguish?

Because they can't see that, at least not while they're in the fog. Who're they going to believe, the Way of the WAS or their lying eyes?

Think about it objectively (and this is something we've discussed in earlier threads of mine) -- decades of research in social-psychology teaches us that, as humans, we hate disconfirming information. We take stuff that doesn't "seem right" and mush and mash and smush and smash it around until it does "seem right" -- where "right" is defined as "matching what we already believe." Each of us knows this just in terms of our politics -- "our" guy is always right, even if he's wrong, because his wrongness is "right."

You think!!!

I had a MC session yesterday evening in which Mrs. Thinker vehemently blamed our deteriorating R directly on my self improvements and changes... ( My post last night on this session )

When I asked why things were getting more tense between us, my W replied:

"It's because of You! It's all of these changes you are making in yourself! They sicken me! I mean, what, here you have been clueless for 13 years (the amount of time we have known each other) and now all of the sudden you are super aware and superdad who always spends time with his kids and always helps out and... I don't know who this person is and I don't like him! He disgusts me!"

So ... because I am nicer, and do more, and am a better dad ... she is unhappier ... logically

I hear you SP! Give your W room to think. She has to see it for herself.