Mindblank #4 - Can I borrow some meds?

[mindfull]

Mike:

My part in this is fairly clear to me. (BTW, this is good to revisit the "list" as I know it)

#1 - Forcing a lifestyle on H that he's not comfortable in. (Big house, fancy cars, country club membership, etc...)
#2 - Putting our intimacy on the back burner. (Kids first, "duties" around the house next, work - work from home so easy to do a LOT, then, maybe H)
#3 - Not sure how to explain this... H would say, "Once you get something in your head that you want something, I might as well just do it/get it, because I will hear about it until I do anyhow." (GEE MB, MAYBE THIS IS WHAT THE PIER IS ABOUT EVEN THOUGH I DIDN'T NAG THIS TIME! WHACK!)

I think that's pretty much it.

So, what am I doing....? To work on my part....?

-- Since THE BOMB, I've encouraged H to drop our country club membership.
-- I've consciously cut down on the shopping.
-- I've kept my car. (In the past I've had new cars every few years.)
-- I'm encouraging the sale of our home. (We were approached by someone interested in our home. It's not on the market. We should know within a few weeks if it is going to happen.)
-- I'm encouraging a "lessor" home, if ours sells.
-- I really do try not to "push." (THERE'S what I was looking for above. He says, I push and push until I get my way. Fair statement of my past.)
-- I'm attentive to him when he's home, hopefully, without crowding him.
-- I've also let him know that I understand the issue with our intimacy, own my part in the problem, and appreciate what we had (during good times) now. I think I've shown him I've done the self reflection, homework, and continue to desire him.