Quick reading of original post tells me that a MC says there are individual issues needing to be resolved before togetherness can be worked on. Does this make sense to you?
Life has an order, people having problems in relationships can mean that a) the problem exists in the R only, or B) the problem exists in the individuals preventing a positive match. That is part of DB approach to work on self as preview to work on M.
I don't think they mind sharing resources since DB is focused on staying in the R. People suggest other readings all the time and there are lists of resources I believe I came across in old postings either archived or forums.
What are your goals? For self? and for M? Don't assume anything about what he says, sounds like he doesn't know himself. If he has prior issues to resolve, his requests may change.
In my sitch, my H has a serious problem. That problem affected our R in a lot of ways. Initially, I took his feedback personally and tried to change what I could. Friends thought he was being unreasonable. When I thought it was unreasonable I stepped back and decided it was his stuff. I began to reset my boundaries and adjusted what I thought was reasonable again. Detaching at this point helped a lot to manage R issues.
As a result of clearer boundaries H saw his problem and got help. He is working on himself now and "our" R issues are more easily resolved.
