New dreams

[Goingdownhill]

Tonight in trying to distance myself from spouse wanting D talk and asking me for space to be done by the end of the year, I said well I guess if D is what you want then I can give you that. He aslo said he feels guilty by all the nice things I'm doing. Doesn't want to lead me on or give me hope. I said I made a committment to him to be nice to him when I married him.

But I did say I guess the dreams we had together to invest in our future and our kids futures will have to go too. But its okay I said "I'll just make new ones".

Very difficult to say but I got it out without crying. Now up at 1:40am bawling and reading. H is on couch sleeping.