It's MY life now!!!........

[Silent Chrleader]

Hey, (((((cire & BM))))).

Thanks for your warm encouragement.

I am thinking that Mondays are just "down" days for me. I am doing OK, but I felt weepy and depressed much of the day. Luckily I was busy at work so I was able to get past it, but it still gets me when for no apparent reason, I feel fine and then crappy in the space of hours.

H didn't reply to my e-mail. D24 said she did call him after talking to me and he was pretty angry at S18. No surprise there, and I don't blame him. I feel like these are just things that push him further into his cave (if that's possible).

Does anybody see even some remote glimmer of hope that my H might come home?? If so, I'd sure like to hear it, because I am feeling it's pretty hopeless right now.

H's girlfriend who he lives with is the sister of one of the other directors where he works. His work means everything to him, so I don't see him breaking that off. Yet he told me he doesn't love her. Yet in all the discussions about the bankruptcy/divorce/legal sep, he kept talking about the possibility of re-marriage (he used to say that he would never re-marry). When I asked if she was pressuring him, he said "no" and told me that he "absolutely" wasn't planning on re-marrying at this time. The reason he gave for wanting divorce instead of legal sep was "closure of that part of his life", and "nobody would date him if there wasn't at least the possibility of marriage". Does any of this make sense to any of you?

Of course it doesn't, I know. It's MLC. But my C told me that he does not go for the MLC lable because he doesn't think that is a good enough excuse. He said the people he has seen in his practice do this kind of thing are people that turned out whose personal value system did not match that which they were living. So, they sort of have a long standing history of "playing a role" that actually is not reflective of what's inside. C said that there was no way I could have seen this coming and likely nothing I could have done about it, because even after a year with H in therapy, C couldn't read him!

That is so depressing!!!!