OK first off you have to read DB and DR. I'm not sure how you lasted this long without them, but you've been doing some real basic mistakes that would have not been committed if you read them.

Go and read them ASAP. You'll see what I'm talking about. All of your fundamental questions will be answered in there.

M-43 W-40
2D - 9 and 5

Emotion, yet peace.
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet a new life.

RECONCILED AND WISER