It sounds to me as though you've found something that works, ie showing him that you aren't going to hang around on his time, so I guess you should keep doing that.
He also sounds like he is still a bit 'MLC' for want of a better description. At least he seems to have woken a little in that he admits he's using work as a security blanket. I was like that when H first left- I couldn't have a minute of spare time to think or I was worried I'd just die from the hurt of it all, FWIW.
I hope you're OK. Let me know if you're free to chat some time.
