Prematurely called divorce busted, worse now

[steady]

I still have hope for my marriage, it is still the most important thing for me to get it fixed, but I have to start thinking about myself for a change.

You have to drop this kind of thinking. You can't 'fix' it. The best sentence here is the last one - focus on you and 'fixing' you and not the M. I learned this the hard way. Fix yourself and if the M gets 'fixed' then that is great.

Both parties have to work on themselves in order for the M to get better. Take care of your half - you have no control over hers.