Agh! He's detached completely!

[Gardener]

I met with gizmo, a kind of ex bf and my attorney, and it was kind of weird. First of all, he was totally unprofessionally dressed and had a 5 day stubble going. I cried for probably 1/2 of our time together when he was asking questions. I've made it very clear that I want to reconcile with my H, because that is what I want right now. At the end, he asked for a hug, and it was very nice, but it did not morph into a kiss, but I was more than happy wiht the hug.

Good for you! I've been following along and when I read the whole wanna-kiss-ex-bf-attorney thing I wanted to chime in and shout, "Stop! Don't go there. Get another (2nd) attorney."

I realize I can no longer think of this marriage long term, nor do I want to, because I'm not sure I WANT HIM for the rest of my life.

I hear ya. I go back and forth on this. Emotionally, at least. But even though what we're all doing is called divorce busting, I find that, intellectually, when I start from a this-marriage-is-over stance, I do the actual, real-time db'ing w/W much more successfully. Go figure.