"You are moving on to a healthier, wiser, stronger and richer place for yourself."
Yes, this line does sound like something fed to a WAW by an marriage counselor of the variety described in the DB chapter "When Therapy Hurts." And as you point out in your thread there seem to be many things in present society that encourage divorce. It's too bad. But the fact remains, I can't do a damn thing about it. All I can do is what Gandhi says: "Be the change you want to see in the world."
You're kind of preaching to the choir here. We've all been left. None of us wanted this to happen. None of us would advocate divorce (except in situations of abuse). The other side probably wouldn't advocate divorce either but they somehow beleive it's their only solution.
If I were to use the above statement myself, it wouldn't come from "divorce is a better place to be". It would come from, "I need to stop the suffering". I don't want to move on but I need to. I have to survive. Bitterness, sorrow, regret, and the whole K-Tel "It Sucks to Be Me" collection" (only $19.95 operators standing by) only continue the pain.
There are some out there who never let anger and pain go. Perhaps you know someone like this. Years, even decades later they are still consumed. They've wasted years of life and energy fighting instead of working for peace. And for what?
It's not validation: "You're right, divorce is so much better". It's: "I can't change your mind. I can only be the best me I can be. I will be the change I want to see."
---
And now a word from my sponsor:
"S/he abused me, S/he beat me, S/he defeated me, S/he robbed me,'' in those who harbor such thoughts hatred (suffering) never ceases.
"S/he abused me, S/he beat me, S/he defeated me, S/he robbed me,'' in those who do not harbor such thoughts hatred (suffering) ceases."
Buddha The Dhammapada Ch 1. Twin Verses
I think there's a world of difference between this:
Quote:
"I can't change your mind. I can only be the best me I can be. I will be the change I want to see."
and THIS:
Quote:
"You are moving on to a healthier, wiser, stronger and richer place for yourself."
