You sound like you are finding a MUCH better path. I know it will be far more productive for YOU and your girls. The past is the past and each day we have the chance to start new and rebuild again.
Your outing with your children sounds like fun.
The one suggestion I have is to stop making yourself so available to your W. When she calls let it go to voice mail. You can always listen to it and if its not urgent or an emergency then just let it go for a while. As I said before, not all calls, e-mails or texts require an immediate response or any response at all.
Like today... what she had to tell you was not urgent and had you let it go to voice mail you could have waited until tomorrow or Monday to respond and you could have done so via text.
Honestly, full coverage on a car that is 11 yrs old is silly in my opinion and the fact that your W said you "need" to look into sort of shows that she still thinks she is boss. You could have simply responded by text saying "thanks for the suggestion, perhaps I will give the insurance provider a call and see if it would be cost effective for me". That way you didnt jump when she called, you didnt agree to do what she told you to do but you didnt just blow it off either.
I think if you can start practicing small things like that the larger issues will become easier to deal with. And it will for sure be a total 180 for you and she will take notice. Wow, Kevin is no longer taking my calls all the time and he isnt jumping through hoops when I tell him to do something. The "power" will shift and maybe not between you and your W but you will certainly regain your own personal power.
Like you said - you paying your own rent and utilities and now anything car related on YOUR vehicle is up to you to decide. That is what separation is all about and I am not really sure your W has had a really good taste of a true separation from you yet.
