There will come a day when your W will comfort you....but, it is far further in the future than you realize or would want it to be.
That statement is so true. In every relationship both parties have needs and expectations, but now is not the time for me to be expressing my needs. My focus must still be on her happiness and her needs, on building trust and demonstrating to her that I have change. I think there is where the challenge is. I so much want us to be closer, more affectionate and more open. But I know that that is not going to happen overnight. Unfortunately, I cannot act as if the past didn't happen, so I must continue to be consistent and trustworthy - knowing that one day she will come around.
Quote:
You cannot let your happiness rise and fall with your W's actions.
My happiness has been correlated on my wife's happiness and that is not a good thing. Yet, it is so hard for it not to affect me. I'm a pretty simple guy. I like to read, have good conversation over dinner and simply relax. By nature I'm an introvert. I like my work and find it more like play rather than work. Apart from that, nothing really matters much to me other than my wife and daughter.
I feel lost right now and I know that I must stick it through. About midway through this DB process, my wife and I were having good conversation and I felt like we were getting closer. Things feel stagnant right now - almost as if there is no chemistry b/t us. I don't want to have a mediocre marriage, but right now I feel like I am putting in all the effort. I've made suggestions to do things like date night or will say something like "I love you" or "I miss you" She either blows it off or says something like "whatever."
I feel so frustrated right now. More than anything I want my wife and I to be connected, to really be loving and affectionate towards each other. I felt like we were moving towards that direction, but things just seem to be a halt at the moment. And yet she will say things like "so, when are you going to propose"
Well, I will write latter. Thanks again FaithfulH for all your advice. I know that this is just a stage I must endure, it's just frustrating sometimes.
