Okay, to get to your long awaited question. Here's what I've been doing for myself.
I've started going to the gym and actually was thinking of running a marathon. I go out with friends but not overboard so I'm not neglecting the kids or dumping them on her. I've also been going to church services by myself. Makes me feel alot better being in touch with a higher power.
When I do these things, I just tell her that I'm going to do them. I do ask if it's okay so I don't seem rude or if she had something planned so the kids aren't thrown off.
When she told me I could go to the gym the other day, it was more of a courtesy as she knew I hadn't been able to make it out this whole week. It wasn't necessarily me getting a pass from her to go like a kid.
I see what you meant about my prior behavior seeming like a third kid. Even though I took on the bulk of the household duties, her perceptions for when I wanted her attention was like a kid. Of course now in retrospect, I know how I should have approached her about the spending time together thing.
When we're home together I take charge and just do things that need to be done. I keep our interactions pleasant and friendly. Although maybe too friendly which would give off the needy vibe that gucci and robx are picking up on.
All those things have been building up my confidence and self-esteem, although I didn't really suffer in that dept. until the bomb.
How she views me in light of all her past perceptions and personal issues, I have no idea. Whatever. I feel better.
That's what I've got going so far. Any other ideas?
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
