Not to be insensitive, but I believe that your H had/has loads of self doubt and low to no self esteem. Most likely a huge trigger was you having to get help to get pregnant. She on the other hand made him feel like such a man when he could accomplish this naturally with her. I am sure she reminds him of this over and over. Once this happened you were out of the race and never even had a chance. He is too immature to understand....
Although he may "improve" he isnt going to change the basic core of who he is. Look at your MIL. This is someone you looked up to and admired. She has no backbone and is so afraid of losing her son she is sacrificing both you and K. Does your mother have a problem with telling you when she thinks you have screwed up? I dont think so. She loves you and wants the best for you and that includes the hard stuff. That is what mothers do. They do not accept bad behavior because they dont want their son to be angry with them.
Start showing all of them that you have boundaries that will not be crossed. Rude telephone conversations...tell him he can call back when he can be civil and hang up......let mil come to you.....no more calls unless emergency......no calls about drop offs....let him call you and if he doesnt, then that is more time you get to have with K........start showing them how it is that you expect to be treated. It will take some getting used to but if you are consistent they will eventually figure it out and start treating you with the respect you deserve.....
