This over the top devotion is also not how you would treat a friend.
But that is not what SP was doing for his wife. He was saying "If you ever really need me, I'll be there to help you. You are not completely alone" That's what you would say to a friend.
By criticizing this as "rescuing" it seems like the only acceptable answer would be "You are right, You'll be all alone! Just you and your cats! Have a nice life! etc" I don't think you would treat a good friend this way.
Oh, I know, and I wasn't referring to SP at all with the first comment.
As for the second, I respectfully disagree. I don't think you say "Have a nice life!" by any means, but I do think sometimes you have to say/project some version of: "I understand this is tough." or "I agree; this is tough on all of us." or "I can see how difficult that must be for you."
You validate, without rescuing or softening -- in my opinion. But you leave them in their crucible, because that is where a lot of the hard introspective works gets done.
