Just a little journaling here. Tonight I am going to move back to my place. I know that wife is not going to be angry with this decision. Not sure if it was the right thing to do or not but I did text her this morning to tell her that I will be coming home tonight. So I am sure that she will be loaded for bear. I am a little nervous as to how I will handle myself.
If I get the chance I am going to tell her "I left when I did because of the fact that it was really overwhelming to me and I could needed time to think on my own. I will also tell her that after thinking about it I understand the way she feels and that if she is welcome to find a new place for herself and do what she needs to do as far as the M".
I am hoping that it ends in that and no more talk of the relationship. Actually i am hoping that she will say that she is glad that I am back and that she has changed her mind on the D. But that won't happen.
After that the tough part will be to detach and robx put it get a !@#$% life.
"Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well" Matthew 6:33
Don't say much at all, just say this is my house, I was stupid for leaving in the first place, don;t know what I was thinking.
If she is ready to unleash on you, simply say that you are not the one that wants to quit on this marriage, but if she needs to leave she is more than welcome to visit the children.>
Ok so I am back in the house and yeah she was extremely pissed.
1. Pissed that I left the house for her to have to do everything. 2. That I didn't tell her where I was. 3. That I talked to my sister about it. 4. That I am back and now she has to move out if she wants to.
I did tell her that I left because when she mentioned D I was scared and needed time to think. She said that while she mentioned D last week splitting things up that she didn't actually say she wanted one until now. I let her know that if she wanted to file for a D or move out that was her choice but I didn't want that.
She went on and on about how she has told her folks what is happening and they are glad because of the things she told them. Which I know is a lie because her mom texted me asked me if the two of us were out two days ago. She is also telling her friends different things as well as one of them called me to tell me that she was now ready to work on it and W was worried where I had been. Funny she never called me to ask where I was and it really didn't seem when she was yelling and talking of D last night that she wanted to work on it.
So the plan right now is to pretty much go dark. She is leaving for the weekend tomorrow and will be gone for 3 days. She says that she will find an apartment when she gets back. I said that is fine, she can look then or she can stay in the place until we have to sell the house it is up to her.
I think that she is extremely confused on things right now and doesn't even know what she is saying or going on in her head. She knows that I lover her and that I am a good husband she is just comletely nuts right now.
When I got home she had also cut her hair died it a totally different color and bought all new clothes. She went out last night and came back really late. I was in our bed when she got home and all she said was "your sleeping in here now" I didn't reply and she grabbed her pillow and went to the other room.
"Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well" Matthew 6:33
Be prepared also for her -- after she's done being livid/pissed -- to actually be INCREDIBLY NICE TO YOU.
And then switch back to mad-as-a-hornet again.
And back.
The "acting nice" can happen as soon as the next day, or maybe a few days or a week later, but it happens more often than not, and LBSs are always stunned by it (I know I was!).
Days or weeks more like minutes. After I got done saying what I had to say I left the room. Not more than 10 minutes later I was working around the house and she began to talk about the dogs like nothing happened. 30 minutes later when she left not even a word out of her as she walked out the door. I am sure that I will see more of this complete switching back and forth.
"Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well" Matthew 6:33
