That was an inspiring post to me! Thanks for putting that down in words so well. Your last paragraph is also where I want to be and I am getting very close. But I still have these moments of weakness, anger and frustration, sometimes because of something W did, sometimes because of remembering the past. I do have a lot to be happy about though, I am making new friends, taking time for myself, doing what I like.
I don't know too much about Mike and Kalni's background (will read up on that tho soon!), but from what I have seen so far here, our 4 sitches are very similar. In my case it seems to me like W is content the way things are going right now, married to work, resisting thinking and doing work on herself to make herself happy. It's evasive behavior and they (WAS's) will realize it one way or another, sooner or later. I remain convinced that if they do the work and make themselves happy, they will be able to have a happy M with us (LBS's'). I hope I will have the strength to hold on until that happens....
