Just when I didn't think I could admire you more, you send this great post. Thank you so much for opening up that part of your life to me. It has given me much to think about.
While I understand that I can't control what she thinks or who she thinks about, I can make damn well sure that our interactions will be so "enjoyable" that when she starts thinking about a new life elsewhere, there will be that seed of doubt in her.
I think in your case it really was a prelude that helped you to stay strong for your M after your H left. You made a decision and you stayed with it whether he was there or not.
Thank you so much for opening up that part.
"What are the other issues that you have control over anyhow?" Right now the only things I have control over are what I do. I feel like my W is just "existing". On the weekends, she'll ask "what should we do today" (with the kids) and goes along with anything I say.
What I'm trying to do is to make the times we are together "supercharged" with happy emotions so that she'll enjoy it and maybe start remembering the good times we had in the past. Right now she says she doesn't remember any. I think this is one of the signs of depression.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
