You sound strong. No real advice for you, other than to not get discouraged and to keep on with your newfound humility and changes.
I've also found that sometimes it helps to go back and re-read what people have posted to you in the past, when perhaps your head wasn't in a place where you were ready to hear it. I haven't followed you long, but I think I would be safe in guessing that you've had some excellent advice already, but haven't always (ever??) followed it.
