antlers - I think it's good to recognize your contributions, but maybe what a&k is saying is not to focus too much on that and really the past... and look forward now.

Quote:
Well, we're not in any physical contact...darn! I know, and believe, that if only one person in the relationship changes...the relationship itself 'has' to change. That's the dynamics of it. I put a lot of stock in what Coach says...and I sure hope he's right!


I was just reading some of Michele's articles and this one follows along with the concept of changing yourself, and the R will change too.

http://www.divorcebusting.com/a_why_change.htm

I think you're doing well. You are 'owning' your responsibility as you should - just don't take more on than you deserve.