OUCH! I followed your thread a long time and I'm sorry you are in this sitch. What a jerk your h was to do that. Of course if the idiot cheater is lying about YOU...all bets are off. "Defense!!", oh yeah, and don't think I'm suggesting any other way of handling that type of thing. I'm not.
But most of you are not reconciled so...isn't it possible that of those who are back together, privacy made it easier? Just food for thought.
I'm "proposing" 3 factors to deal with: 1-consider the collateral damage of exposure very carefully, 2-examine your real motives, and 3-decide if this is going to hurt or harm your chances of reconciling b/c I do think that matters and it does not involve hiding things, it means keeping them private. (If you know you won't reconcile, and no innocents would be harmed...I can see some very creative ways and reasons to expose...oh yeah...)
OTOH, Kev4 wants his wife back big time. So he exposed his w's A to all her family and work and it backfired. W's family thinks poorly of him anyhow so then they saw him as also vindictive and that the M was "over anyhow already", etc. and his wife hated him for it, (but his case is unusual and we can't use one anecdote to "prove" anything). And we are not trying to "prove" anything are we? Aren't we all just trying to support the restoration of marriages? Or alternatively, surviving a horrible loss...?
And supporting people in becoming the best that they/we can become. You all are using the words exposure and you are not using the word "shame" and I appreciate that distinction.
But In most of these cases discussed tonight, the idiots exposed themselves,!! (if you will), so shame is what the idiots MUST feel to be such awful fools...good grief. SIGH...
J-
PS Puppy can you check stuck's thread for my post there so I don't repeat myself. Wanted to share something with you there...
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
