Seperated

[LitlHopeAlwys]

The W and I spoke on the phone tonight for about 30 mins. I promised myself in the beginning that I wouldn't cry/beg or plead with her. I did good for the first 10 minutes if I lasted that long.

The conversation started with her asking that its is ok with me if on Saturday, I take him for his blood work and a haircut later in the day. I don't mind I see him every other weekend, and bond with him as much as I can in through couple days, but I also try to help her out so that she is not stressed - right now I think its me stressed out and not her at all - she seems to have her life under perfect control and mine's spiraling out of control.

We spoke about our relationship, and how I want her and S3 to come back home that I know he can work this out and try coaching. She said that she will not try anything, that she does not want to be married, and that she does not fell that anything can be worked out. At the same time she told me she does not want me out of her life - I tried to tell her I don't think that it would be possible - I couldn't handle that.

She said that if she did come back home and it was the slightest like it was before it would not be good - I agreed - it wouldn't be, and that is why I have been working on myself and realizing all that things I have done wrong and not willing to make those mistakes again.

All she would say is trust me one day you'll look back on this and say it was for the better - I told her I hope that its one day with her that we look back on it together.

She seems very set in her ways, although she says its not easy for her, on having the D finalized in the next few months. I asked her once again, to try coaching from here with me, instead of counseling, she was very unwilling.

I am at the point that I don;t know what to do anymore, I have now read and re-read DB about 5 times, and I am just stuck in this holding pattern.

Anybody that's ever been in a sitch or similar one I could really use some advise right about now.