You'll never see me fall from grace

[Sugar and Spice]

Score one for Betrayed Spouses Everywhere!!!!

The proverbial pigeons have finally come home to roost. So H had the numbers run on the Diso. Master, by someone who knows the legal system and the Grand Total comes to....$477.00. The paperwork I filed and the stipulated agreement that is on file has worked like a charm. That number is also the very high maximum. The reality will be more like $375 - $400. She is getting about $600 now between daycare and food and diapers. She told him the other day..."Give me $800.00 and don't take her around me and we'll be done!" Ummmm...how bout, NO?

H told her today and he said you could visibly see the air go out of her. Apparently she is also not the brightest crayon in the box because she is now encouraging H to come home because in her world, if he is here then the $$ he is paying me goes away and he will be able to pay her more. I guess she thinks that if he moves back in here, that the house payment will magically go away and he will be able to pay her more. I'm guessing that she shouldn't sit by the mailbox and wait for her application to MENSA to arrive anytime soon.

So H is going to encourage her to come to an agreement that he can then get on paper and file with the courts. If she continues to be resistant then he is going to tell her to take him to court and whatever she gets awarded will be exactly what she gets and nothing more. If she is willing to do and agreement, then he would more inclined to make things as amicable as possible and do more than what the court would order, but if she wants to fight then she will only get what she fights for. I'm not talking about handing her more cash, but buying diapers and formula or food and other essentials and extras.

I wish I could say that it feels really good, but unfortunately its sort of a hollow victory. Yes, I outsmarted her and while that feels good, there are no real winners in this kind of situation. Just various degrees of loss.

But the meaner side of me would love to send a text along the lines of...How Do You Like Me Now? But instead I think I will wait until I finally get to meet her in person and then just laugh. The screwin' you got wasn't nearly as good as the one your getting now.

[blindsided1]

Not to play devil's advocate, but the disomaster calculates his CS responsibility. My H has to pay that PLUS half the daycare PLUS half the medical bills. The total amounts to about $1000/month. Just keep that in mind. OW is scrambling to keep a grip on your H...hence the bombardment of phone/texting. Telling him to go home to you is a total game...she doesn't want that. She wants to win. It's like me telling my H that I don't love him anymore. I wanted to hurt him by showing him I didn't care about him...big fat f'ing lie and he knows it.

I hope it goes in your favor. OW doesn't deserve sh!t. Good that your H provides for the child. Mine NEVER did. He thinks having her one day a week...he's taking care of her and providing as much as I am...delussional. But, little does he know, I filed a case with DCSS. Now they will garnish whatever they can get their hands on, plus back pay, plus 10% interest....and when "they" get married and he gets fired for the 25th time...she'll be paying my CS. That's when I am going to send a thank you card to her and maybe I'll put in the "how do you like me now" or maybe "you wanted to buy my H, this is how much he costs".

[Sugar and Spice]

Blindsided this number is in reference to the actual amount of cash he would have to put into her greedy little hands. She is under the impression that she should get at least $800 a month plus what he is doing now. He is paying ALL of the daycare, providing all of the food and diapers for the baby right now. The biggest problem with him just handing her the $$ is that she will spend it gambling and then the baby won't have what she needs.

Its only a victory in that she thought this would net her a bonus check every month and its not really working out the way she planned.

I am totally in favor of him doing more than what the disso master says because its the right thing to do, but handing her money to blow on herself is just not a good idea, because then the child suffers and that sucks.

In your case, when they get married you should look into having a CS lien put on their home for the back that he owes. CSS will help you with this.

Everything I did to prevent this from happening to me is what you should do for you and K. I filed my papers to protect my kids and me, but I don't want his D to go without because I think her mother is a money-grubbing whore. She has proven that by suggesting that he move home just for the sole purpose of paying her more. She doesn't seem to get that the money is for the baby and her care, not for her own personal use.

[kat727]

Selfish to the core! She has to really get her act together. You may even have to get someone appointed to handle those funds your H does give her to make sure they are going to the baby. Well not you, but your H.

So are you doing well? Got those wings rested up enough to fly over? lol

kat

[karen43]

Prob. shouldn't be asking this, but should the troll have custody of the baby? I know that's a whole can of worms, but she sounds like she's not very fit to be a mom from stuff you've said. Karen

[blindsided1]

Sug - she ruins it for the rest of us. My H left me with ALL our debt, no CS, no formula, diapers, clothes, wipes, no medical insurance (I pay $180/month for her alone), nothing. And, when I ask...he tells me has bills to pay so he can take care of his daughter....give me a break. Maybe she would be willing to draw up papers stating that he will continue to pay the DC and supplies, but not give her any cash. If she doesn't go for it and he does have to go to court, maybe he should mention her gambling addiction and they can draw it up somehow. It's really sad to see people act like that. Since K was born, I haven't bought a thing for myself. Every bit of money I get goes to food, diapers and clothing and toys for her. For my birthday, I told everyone to get me NOTHING, just help me pay for the food at K's party and buy her a present instead. If I could get buy on my money alone, I would take H's CS and put it into a money market or invest it for her future and not touch a bit of it. I have no problem sacrificing for my child.

[Sugar and Spice]

Blindsided, you my friend are the flipside of this coin. You are a good mother and saddled with a man who takes no responsibility for the care and welfare of his child other than to make himself appear to be a Dad. I'm so sorry that it has to be that way for you and it will come back to haunt him in the end. You do the things you do for K because she is your baby and not a paycheck...it certainly does not seem to be the case with the Troll. Its ALL about HER and the baby is a bargaining chip that she uses when it suits her.

Karen and Kat...IMHO the Troll should not have custody of this child and probably only visitation. Who knows how it will end up. I don't know if she is a bad mother or not, but from what I've seen she is a very spoiled, self-centered person and she is only a "mommy" when the situation suits her whims. Whatever...she will agree to something or not, there is nothing I can really do about it but watch it play out.
Thanks guys.
The wings are recharging...just so ya know.

[Sugar and Spice]

Ok, how psycho is this? My phone is blocked to her calls and texts but because she saved a voice mail I left her...IN DECEMBER OF 07, she can reply and leave me voicemails.

A voicemail popped up on my phone last night. They are fighting because she doesn't want to sign an agreement and so when he gets tired of her calling repeatedly, he shuts off his phone. Thats when she used to call or text me, now its voicemails. I just save them. One of these days I'd like to put together a complilation mix of some of her "classier" highlights. Maybe I'll do that and post it on Youtube...that or make a disk and send one to each of her family members.

Im not going to bother to respond, it just keeps it going but damn this is getting old.

[Puppy Dog Tails]

Ok, how psycho is this?

Pretty psycho.

Puppy

[fightingirish]

Hey sugar... sorry ive been MIA... Can't believe the change of events.. what a nut job!!!! GFY!!!