Yeah, I'm not anywhere near being able to date. I'm not comfortable being out there and although it was nice having a conversation with someone, it wasn't worth the anxiety it caused me. So, I won't be doing that again. Anxiety solved.
Surviving is hard enough work!
I forgot to reply to kat!
Kat - My church is assisting so many of our members already that I don't know if I can bring myself to ask. The help they give is with food and clothing and those seem to be holding out ok. I would gladly file for bankruptcy if I thought it would help, but I don't think having a payment plan is going to make it any better. Even if I didn't pay the 4 credit card bills I have, I still don't make enough for the necessities and can't afford to move. Oh lordy....what to do?
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
Hey Mish.. I hear you about Gabe.. and its completely innapropriate to shout at him, after the D and him moving out and all the confusion anyway on the poor boy, neverlone that he is in teh autism spectrum so perhaps yes, he needs to have different expectations of him right now??? I think you are right to limit access to Gabe, sadly, as long as they dont throw that back at you when he's older. Its a fine line to tread hey.
So, you cant pay the bills or afford food now... whats happening with you not wanting to ask your Mum for more money out of her allowance? Can you just tell her.. Mum, I need some more money from you, for the next few months until I get back on my feet??
I dont know what I am going to do either.. I have been looking for a job all day, but with 2 million unemployed here (thats bad) and particularly bad sitch in Cornwall with redundanices, I cant find a job !! First time ever, since I started work at 15.
I cant believe you met a man online and went for a coffee date!! Wow, you kept that quiet from all of us. Please dont say "I'm never doing that again"..how about, not for NOW, or maybe, exchange some emails before deciding to meet next time?? You have SOOOO much to give a new partner, your warm and funny and gorgeous and smart and spunky and.. oh I could go on, but I hate to think of you closing off the chance to find love someday. But well done for going, very brave !! But, maybe online dating is too risky...
My top tip for finding a nice, intelligent, responsible man is... go to a martial arts class !!! That kind of discipline attracts sweet, thoughtful guys.. loads of them in my class AND they are all fit and hunky and you get to grapple with them up close, bare chested whilst they are practically wearing pyjamas !!!
Love Al xxx
Me:40! H:37 Together: 12yrs IDLY & left 11/07 ADs 03/08 OW 8/08 Reconciled 05/09 now married! my thread
You've got your thinking backwards! You took the chance, and went out with a guy. And even if there wasn't chemistry, you had a nice enough time that you might have made a friend! Then you use that as a reason to figure you can't do it again! Look, you lived to tell the tale, you had a bit of a break from the everyday stuff! I'd say it was a success! Hey, at least he didn't tell you that you eat slowly!
Last edited by Virtually_Handsome; 06/17/0904:48 PM.
Not an excuse, just a realization that this isn't for me. I'm not comfortable meeting people that way. I figure, if I'm meant to have another R in my life, it will have to be with someone met under natural circumstances. I don't have the guts to do this internet thing. It made me FAR too anxious. It was ok, just not something I'm going to continue to do.
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
It is strange isn't it? On the one meet up I did, I dressed nicely and he wore workout sweats!! See where I ranked! I was no where near ready to date and there was nothing there. Really I wanted to shake his hand and say sorry this didn't click. But still good that you took a chance.
I bet you'll meet someone that will change your mind on all of this stuff...when you least expect it.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
mish, just read about your date (I like Donna's idea about money too). I agree with Mike, you are more ready than you think you are... Did anyone tell you you will meet your Prince on the first date? If they did, they lied!! Ask Mike!! He sure had some ...interesting experiences before finding his Princess. xxx K
Guys, it's not about the guy or the date or anything. It's about me! I now know that I'm not comfortable with meeting people this way. I had to test the water and now I know. No biggie, just good to know. I just won't attempt that again, that's all. Good experience.
If it happens someday, it does. If it doesn't, I'll deal.
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
My .02...on the internet dating...it's a crap shoot like everything else. Sure there are some bad apples but there are some good people also..I've tried it all..Interent, social networking sites, bars..anywhere and everywhere....I guess my point is if you limit yourself or close off one area then the pool of good people to pick from dwindles considerably..
