I think you need to show consistent, loving actions towards yourself - if you see her then cool, if not, at the end of the day all of this is for YOU and your children, not her.
Treating yourself with consistency and love will make you a better father, man and partner. Now it might not make you a better parter to your W but one day, you will still be a better partner even if its with somebody else.
A while back my H said to me "whoever gets to be with you next is lucky because you have changed so much". LOL! Darn right they will be lucky! Since last July (July 08) I have seen my H a total of 5 times but we have had phone conversations and e-mails. I know I am a better me and one day that will make me a very good partner. Who will that partner be? WHO KNOWS! For now though I am my own partner and things are working out just fine in the new R I am having with myself.
