"Exposure" vs. "Shame"

[RustyShackleford]

...And I stand by my point as well, and that is you can just as easily point to cases where marriages end in divorce and it might have gone differently if the betrayed spouse had been MORE aggressive, not less so.
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Many LBSs, in cases of continued and flagrant infidelity, wish they had taken a stronger stand for their OWN self-esteem and emotional well-being.

My wife lost all respect for me because I listened to those on this board (and my DB coach, I might add). For some, "bo peep" works. For many (including myself - and most men), it's time to grow a pair and stand up for what's right.

From another PDT post:

MOST LBSs can't handle prolonged (longer than 6 months) deceit and infidelity. To men, especially, it can be emasculating.

Yep... I thought I could do it, but in the end, the adulterous relationship took a HUGE toll on my self-esteem. A couple of months if IC helped, though.

BTW, I was, at one time, a prolific poster here, under the name MarkInOhio (or some form of that). Perhaps some here remember me. Regardless, my marriage is headed for divorce; my wife has absolutely no respect for me, and she treats strangers and dogs better than she treats me. But, as I said, I found a great therapist, and I am OK. In fact, my future looks very bright. I know what I need to do, and how to get it done. There's nothing ahead of me that I can't handle.