I, Your emotions are on a rollercoaster and they will be that way for a while. Detaching means not reacting to his behavior, comments, antics. You can detach and still leave the door ajar.
In your case, just as others w/children, you will have to have some contact with the nut. Detaching may be a bit more difficult for you because of that.
Don't beat yourself up...you are doing well for what you are having to listen to.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
