Since you brought up the beautiful comment, how does a guy show to you that you're beautiful? If your H told you, would you just think he's throwing you a line? Sometimes I would compliment her (before the bomb) and she would just roll her eyes.
Also, you mentioned something about her feeling depressed which is why she didn't want to talk to my mom last night. What makes you think that?
I think you need to get to a place where you are not so concerned about her response before you do this. No fear!!! You need to mean it and be someone who it matters hearing it from...
Ha, if WAH tells me I look "beautiful"...mmmm, feels good. If H pre-bomb said it, "hmmm...what does he want from me?"
So, when you are on your way somewhere, feeling confident, feeling like a 10, you give her a quick glance and say "jesus, you're beautiful" and leave...I mean say it with one foot out the door. That would've done something for me.
The coffee thing, not in that state of mind (at least IMO). You want NOTHING from her, you have a life, you're an awesome guy who genuinely notices that she is beautiful.
That's the best I can do on that...waaaaa, wish I had a LBS...
Oh, and on the depression, ya, it is depressing as hell to be in your wife's shoes. No way around it. I was there. Read SP's post; he's lucky enough to have had his wife spell it out (well maybe that was mojo more than luck ;)). Read what his wife said...it sucks to be her. I'm not saying it is exactly the same but that's the gist of it IMO.
And all of this brings us back to mojo...trust me, you have somewhere to go, you love yourself, you're a 10, then and only then can she see your compliment as having value AND hopefully see you as someone worth paying more attention to.
