You sound like your handeling things well. I have gone through most of the same process your M has gone through and now I have been successful at reconciliation for over a year since last may. We just moved back in together in the end of april. It has taken a year to heal and their is still more healing to go. Take it step by step.
Be patient Be kind Dont over-react Be sure of your needs and wants Prepare for frustrations and roadblocks (such as this first one - with the NC). Let them prove to you they love you over time. Every time you get through a road block, you will heal even more. Pray.
You have a long haul ahead towards healing and reconciliation, it takes time and patience. Let him do a lot of the work and do what you know you should to be loving (despite the past pains).
Remember, forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. So keep your boundaries, but also know that sometimes people will continuously mess up. This doesnt mean it has to be over, you can always take a break from him again for a week (or a few if necessary). Let him get through his drama, then he will be so much more of a good H to you. It takes a while. My H went back and forth with drama for about a year. Now I can finally see him approaching the other end.WHew!!!!
