My W used to do the same thing to me, and it really did make me sad.
It was a bed of my own making - I was working too much and focused on things other than my family, but at the time I was convinced that I was doing it because I had to provide for my family. When they would get back and the kids would have had a great time and I was never involved, It would make me sad, lonely and jealous.
I tried to tell my W that once (a long time ago in an early C session), and she refused to listen - "It's ridiculous that you feel that way, you are never around!"
This is just to tell you that you are right, there may be something to it - even if your H was making his own decisions.
Me 42, W 39, S8, S6, S2 M 11y, A & ILYBNILWY 11/08 Walking away from a bad situation.
