Something else I've pondered - the type of person that the WS is. I understand most WS's are entitled, selfish, etc. - in my own situation to the extreme - but from what I gather most situations.
But there are some WSs that act that way prior to the A. In this case - is it not possible that a "pure DB" approach might simply encourage the A because they have a lack of respect for you to begin with?
Once you've lost respect with your spouse - I have a hard time wrapping my head around the emasculating principles of pure DBing if they take actions which you can tell are designed to cause you pain.
For some of us - especially me "hiding" lots of Ws private persona during our relationship - a 180 might actually entail exposure. When they are used to walking all over us, and we are used to walking on eggshells... maybe a 180 would be standing up for yourself and ultimately even if you make your spouse angry you will at least gain respect... especially for yourself.
"You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into."
